Feliz Cumpleaños and good-bye

FELIZ CUMPLEAÑOS PAULINITA!!!!!
te quiero mucho amiga! it was a couple of days ago, but here's this:




And with that, I say goodbye.

With the end of the year always comes reflection and new expectations. I am happy and thankful for this year. It has been good and bad, happy and sad, and memorable. I got to see people I love. I got to see my dad and my friend Paulina after so many years. And the first of the year I got to see my brother JuanCa after almost 6 years. 2008 has left me with many blessings, but also, with a big hole inside.

I started this blog out of nothing, so beside from somewhat outlining part of my journey in the past 5 years it didn't go anywhere. So I have to move on. Move on from this space to new, wonderful things. :)

For now, find me here, here, and here.

I wish you life, health and happiness.

Feliz Navidad to you and yours!!

I wish you a very happy time!!! Enjoy the time with your family, friends and
loved ones. There's nothing better than that!!!

:)

He took my pain away

This was a hard week for me. And I asked Him to take the pain away and He did.

Thank you God.

oh i've been reading about batteries

And it looks like i need to calibrate my macbook pro battery. If it doesn't work i'll have to call apple support... it might be just a little too late to talk about calibrating a battery though... zzzZZZ.

Oh yeah... "Nothing like the Holidays" is my new fave. Will have to buy it for next Christmas... will be a movie tradition, just like Love Actually.. well, almost.

Y bueno, pareciera que no tengo nada de sueño... that's what night walks at the park do to you. Specially when it's cold. I have a full day planned for tomorrow... or later today, I should say. I have some shopping to do and some wandering. Oh, i love the definition of wandering... very poetic.

"walk or move in a leisurely, casual, or aimless way"

I am listening to the wind and the very crusty leaves that are dancing to its melody just outside this window. It's very cold outside. And I got tired of my glasses, put them away, and now the lights seem magical.

The moon tonight was beautiful. The night before I was born there was a beautiful moon, it was so bright that my mom thought the sun was still out. She said that's maybe why I like the moon so much. But then I told her how much I like the sun too.

Oh, this thinking has made me sleepy. Buenas noches.

Nonstop

From here to there. It's been a long day. From work to work to grocery shop to visit to eat to come back and talk. Oh my. I'm not done yet. One watercolor design to go and I'll be good for bed.

Snow clouds and a Micky D's gift card

I drove under snow clouds tonight. Clouds so bright that you think the lights of a stadium could be on, or that maybe the day hasn't ended yet. It's cold and I find myself journaling again. Not very lively, but journaling again.

Love, actually.

Emails emails. I want to hang out with you. and you. and you. There's a movie i want to see today and tomorrow and the next day. But just this month. Every movie has its season, every season has its move. Every day gets closer to the end of the year and the beginning of the new year. New calendars, new goals or maybe we'll recycle. Quiero esto, quiero aquello, but that's what I really want.

Enough.

Sitting, standing. Cliché reigning over talks and the news crashing down on the little people and forgetting details that make them seem ridiculous and completely unprepared. I am standing and I read the sentences of the famous man that was murdered and that lives forever in those words. Those powerful words that someone forgot to teach me how to pronounce. I am sitting. Listening to the cords of his guitar. With my eternal soul. Alone. Not lonely. Always trying to repair someone else and pretending I know how. Unicorns aren't real. If they were, they'll be blue and yellow, and they wouldn't fly. Inanimate objects call a name, not my name, they can't pronounce it. I told you cliché reigns over talks. I got two eyes and they are fine and see color so bright and soft and they can't see too far out.

This is nothing. Just words. But I could be wrong. Wrong for stealing lines and borrowing air. Kisses kissses kisssses in foreign countries where I once stepped foot. I am standing on the top of an ancient sanctuary and in the middle of a ball park. On top of the tallest hand-made mountain you can imagine, and the stars look so far still.

Once upon a time was too long ago.

But there's this song that reminds me of rainy afternoons and bus rides. What a long green ride. What a sharp image. What a dusty country and how colorful were those stamps. They don't use stamps anymore. It's a waste of ink, I heard. Also someone that now is really famous found out how to stamp in invisible numbers. My eyes can't see those, no matter how close they are. I haven't seen them this week. I also haven't seen that man. And I have seen too many strangers and I remember their names, and I've forgotten the name of friends and only remember their faces now. Memory. I have to back up the memory or I'll forget. But I won't ever forget of the rose that you killed. Who's waiting? Oh make them wait and they'll eventually go home. Push away, let go. What does it all mean? I was interesting at some point in time. And it wasn't too long ago, but no no more. Tell me a story and I'll make up the ending. The beginning is yours to keep I don't want it. And you can correct me, but keep the draft marked with red pen because I will through it out for you.

And someone said everyone will say they believe, but what if someone can't say it and that mouth doesn't even open for a smile. Oh the green grass and the warmth. What are those flying lights? The song's over, so I'll get up.

5 years

Today marks 5 years since my first blog post.



Time flies.

WHAT?????!!!!!!!!

Oh Jack Johnson

I have a song in my head and it's got me smiling every 5 minutes and moving from side to side as if I was at the live performance. I was also thinking how hard it is to reflect. I used to be much better at it. The words would flow and every now and then, a poem would come and give life to an simple thought, making it float, making it dance to the melody of my heart. But sometimes is hard to give any more thought to what's already hard to take in.

Always looking out... says Jack on that song. Always looking out.

The past month of my life has been nothing short of a roller coaster and I'm
still not caught up work and rest. So words... they're the last item on the list... at least worthy of writing. I still have a lot of silly, bad composed sentences coming out of my mount faster than they travel my mind. Foolish. Funny. Annoying, I would imagine.

Oh, but sometimes is just hard to write without a melody in your heart. They won't come out if it's not along a beautiful melody of the heart. So we just float. We float above any meaning, any essence. We build dreams with clouds instead of hard metal that would last a few more years. And by we, I mean I. Always looking out... said Jack on that song.

I'll keep humming the song in my head. Words don't come so easy today. Maybe because I
want green tea and honey. And because I'm not taking time to revisit moments. I am content with right now. I feel good. I love that song in my head and I'm looking out... I need this right now. A break. Recoup and will look in tomorrow. Or the day after. Miracles take time to digest and they change you. I know I'm not the same I was a month ago. But for now, I won't try to figure out what's different, for the rest of the night I'll just keep humming my song.

Always looking out....

I witnessed the miracle.

My tio Gil lived a miracle yesterday. Thank YOU for giving him life again... right in front of my eyes. I can't go into detail, but he has been given a second chance. And so have I.

So many photos!!!

I am a little overwhelmed of how many photos and how many ideas I got during the Ozarks 992 trip... oh yeah. That's the name. Oh, I also am a little sad that all my friends that want to go with me to the Folk Fest are NOT near me :(

I need me some friends in town. And THAT thought is one that never ever had cross my mind before.

OzarkFolkFestival.com

I really want to go to this...

Back and gone again!!

I came back from my trip with Anna today. More about that later. I have to go now... for the whole week. I'll be able to work on my photos until Saturday next week!!! I don't know if I'll be able to wait until then :)

I'm gonna need some green tea with lime and honey PRONTO

'nuff said.

The next few days.... the last few days....

I love this portrait of my mom:


And now that fall has finally taken over all the trees around this place, the time for the trip me and my friend longed for so much we are finally taking it.. This Friday we take on the state for three days. I will come back refreshed. Thank you Lord!


I will come back refreshed...

I am always in the middle of doing something

Yesterday was my cousin's homecoming dance so we took a bunch of photos that I have yet to download and edit, so here's one from a previous photo shoot. I'm right now in the middle of organizing my living/work space and it's taking long. It's specially taking long because my legs are very sore from a walk uphill yesterday. It was fun though... Arrivederci. I have a whole lot more to do...

Film

I got some batteries today for my beloved film camera. I will have you with me every moment. I've missed you so much!

Through a fortune cookie

God talked to me through a fortune cookie yesterday. He's been looking at me, shouting, painting the message in the sunsets, through my mother's smile and I have been missing it all. Yesterday I got a fortune cookie from a friend and when I opened it my eyes watered. It said "You will soon witness a miracle."

And now everything is so clear and so confusing at the same time. Please talk to me more... teach me to listen, because I forgot how to listen to you a long time ago.

Mañana!!!

Tomorrow is the opening of El Pollo Campero!!! I'm excited!!

I'm also really tired. I've been working until late this week. And I still
have so much to do. I like being busy... but I'd love me a nap right about
now.

POLLO CAMPERO GOODNESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

MAÑANA, CAN'T WAIT FOR MAÑANA!!!

 

El Pollo Campero

in Rogers opens tomorrow..... .We'll be in line for about an hour or so, but we'll get it!!!!!!!!

Click click click click

Quick update:
I got a lens!!! EF 50mm f/1.8 II baby....



and I've been playing with multiple exposures the digital way....

Looking forward

Here's a new month. October. If I was in my country, I would be expecting winds.. ans who knows what else, at this point in my life. I miss those winds.

Here, the days are getting colder and the sky is painted of a perfect blue that overwhelms everything with a clarity that makes us so aware of change. Soon the trees will transform. Their leaves will change colors to yellows, oranges and reds. Fall is beautiful, but I dread the cold a bit. I'm sure I'll remember how to love it soon, but now, I dread the cold.

I am excited about things to come. About a photo trip around the Ozarks with Anna. About new paintings and new pictures and empty spaces. I have to move materials out of my room. I need a studio.

Oh well. I have this to share. A new commercial I've seen on TV. Reminds me of friends.
I love it.

José's little one!!!

José's daughter was born this week on the 22nd and she is so beautiful and tiny!!! I meet her yesterday and gave her a painting I made for her. They're moving to FL in a couple of days and I wish them the best.

Dios te bendiga linda!!!

Adios Verano: the last of my summer imagery

Lately

I'm playing in the photo trade this month. This is one of the photos I'm sending:


I met Damián Alcázar on Sunday when I was meeting my friend at barnes & noble. I saw him come in and I recognized him. Earlier this summer I read an article in the local Spanish newspaper that he's been in town, studying English at the UA. I was pretty excited to have my camera with me:


Game on Saturday against Alabama... I'm wearing my new #7 Jersey. Go Alex! Go HOGS!

Dear April,

I have today marked in my calendar with your name. Today makes three years since I last saw you. I can't forget that the last time I saw you he was with you. That conversation was left pending as did so many plans we had together.

 

Today makes it three years closer to the day I see you again.

I keep missing you, my friend.

 

Rest in love.... Until the next smile.....

Se me olvido otra vez que solo yo te quise

Se me olvido mi iPod en la casa hoy. Asi que la oficina solo suena a
telefonos, conversaciones en las que no estoy interesada, a los teclados
alreadedor, clicks y al aire acondicionado que todavia esta encendido a
pesar de que afuera de estas paredes el aire se esta poniendo más fresquito.

Asi que de memoria me toca cantar en silencio los versos de los que me
acuerdo. Y de los que no me acuerdo, me los invento. Hoy despues de terminar
lo que tengo que hacer en la casa voy a ir en busca de fotografias.

Sigo cantando con la version de Maná en la cabeza... "probablemente ya de mi
te has olvidado y mientras tanto yo te seguiré esperando, no me he querido
ir para ver si algun día que quieras tu volver, me encuentres todavía..."

Ni todo el amor, ni todo el dinero

Palabras sabias de la mamá de Roberto refiriendose a las relaciones interpersonales.

No ha parado de llover

La orillita del huracán Gustav llego hasta aca y desde hace dos días no ha dejado de llover. Si no fuera por las hojas en los árboles aun adornando las ramas y bien verdecitas, parecería invierno.

Estos días lluviosos me recuerdan que ya se me fue de las manos el verano de este año. Asi de rápido se pasan los días cuando uno no quiere que se vayan. De niña, deseando que las vacaciones a final de octubre llegarán, se me hacian eternos los días y los meses. Los vientos de octubre me decian que ya casi llegaba el tiempo por el que habia esperado todo el santo año.

Hay mucho trabajo en mi calendario marcado para los siguientes tres o cuatro días. Se fue tan rápido la semana!!!

Etc otra vez

Ya terminé Como Agua Para Chocolate. La terminé anoche mientras la lluvia caia afuera de mi ventana en las posas que ya se habian formado. La historia me encantó, y talvés el que haya leido la babosada de Do Travel Writers Go to Hell me ayudo a apreciar la literatura de calidad mucho más aun. Que buena historia!! todavia me tiene soñando!! Y es que el libro que lei anteriormente no se puede describir de otra mañera que una jayanada. Es bueno para medio pasar el rato, pero no puedo decir que saque nada más que
un par de carcajadas de ese libro. Por lo menos me quite las ganas de leerlo.

Ya le tengo que devolver la obra de Laura Esquivel a Sandy. Ya le escribí para decirle lo mucho que me encantó.

Me retiro por el momento. He estado tratando de escribir más porque mi amiga me lo reclamó y en cierta forma, para guardar mis días de alguna manera. No he tenido ganas de nada ultimamente. Ni de escribir, ni de tomar fotos, ni de pintar, ni de dibujar y mucho menos de terminar mi sitio de internet. A ver que ondas. Quiza cuando se me terminé este castigo que me ha caido por quien sabe que... quiza fue culpa de Eva, aunque yo más se la echo a Adan. Las mujeres cuando andan en sus días saben lo incomodo que es, y pues que pasa que no ha bastado con un par de semanas ya?!

Libros, etc

Hace tres días empece a leer Como Agua Para Chocolate de Laura Esquivel. Siempre habia tenido curiosidad de leerlo pero hasta el momento no se habia presentado la oportunidad, pero hace un par de semanas mi amiga Sandy me presto el libro para que de una vez por todas le prestará el respeto debido y lo leyera.

Y qué puedo decir?! Mis complejos de lectora choyuda quedaron en algún lugar muy lejos de mi existencia, porque al paso que voy, termino el libro mañana... si, sería en solo días. Y es que es uno de esos libros que no se pueden cerrar una vez uno ha comenzado con la primera oración de cada capitulo... y al final de cada capitulo, hay que sequir y sequir hasta que me arden los ojos (es que leo de noche).

Ah, pero el ardor de ojos no es solo por la alta hora nocturna que alcanzo, sino tambien por las chilladas que me pego! Parezco la misma Tita cuando pica cebollas!

Este es un libro que después de devolverselo a la Sandy voy a tener que comprar... mis respetos!

An almost good-bye to August

It's almost the end of the month and I'm here... with more projects at hand since.... I don't know, the beginning of the summer, maybe.

I am happy.
I miss the Olympics.
I am still reading that book (Do Travel Writers Go to Hell?").
I am not so happy with my slow reading skills.
I am very excited about the new project.
I can't wait for the end of the week and the Arts Fest!!!
I got to eat my first yellow watermelon.
It was delicious!
I am still hooked on Café Tacuba... and some other music.
And... I present to you, my first faked lomo photo. Thank you to a handy little online tutorial.

Summer Imagery Número Dos

AMAZING!!!

WHO ISN'T IN AWE OF MICHAEL PHELPS AT THE MOMENT?! BRAVO!!!!!
One World, One Dream.
Go World.

a summer like this one

Past summers in this country have been busy. Scheduling around classes, work, conferences and family visits. This is the first summer I have had time to breath and look around me. I've fallen in love with the yellow and greens of this season and I don't want them to go away, although I know the orange and reds of the fall landscape also fill my heart. I wouldn't change a thing about my life, but I am really thankful this summer is slow.. That's my mom in the picture.

Anna

Friend... We messed up.
We had to go on an Elizabethtown-like adventure before you left this side of the country.
I've found how beautiful and magical this place can be.
I've also found the statue of the Christ, Dinosaur World and now I know where the bridge is... I found that yellow bridge!!!
Maybe you can come back sometime and we can go find things and take photos.
You can put some music and I'll put some more music for the soundtrack of a trip.

I used to rule the world

It's amazing how we can fall in love with times and things and we can get stuck there. I am excited about life and I want to travel the world. At this point in my life I think I'm meant for something different, though. I believe that my purpose in life right now is to ease the life of others in my family. Please let me know if I'm not fulfilling my purpose like I should be, and help me do it. Thank you God, thank you.

Fun Weekend

I had a blast this weekend. I spent a lot of time with my mom and it was good. We went to see The Mummy- Tomb of the Dragon Emperor today and she was falling asleep in the theater!!! I enjoyed it very much, thought. I'm a fan of all the Mummy movies :)

Saturday was really good too. We went to the farmer's market and here's my favorite picture of that morning:


It's been HOT everywhere these days... but nice. Summer days are going away! The sun went down at about 8:12 pm yesterday. These days also mark a year since Keren left for home. I'm thinking about her family a lot.

Complete

The set of photos from my daddy's visit is finally complete. It's on my flickr here (CLICK). I'm happy to have been able to enjoy him for that time and I hope I can see him again soon.

Tomorrow...farmer's market with my mom!

Happy weekend!

Revisando memorias

While fixing photos, posting them, adding captions, etc.... I'm smiling and finding favorites. I like this photo of my dad. I took it when I was waiting for my freshly squished lemonade. My dad was on the other side of the tent getting fresh Ethiopian coffee while it was about 98 degrees Fahrenheit in downtown Fayetteville during the farmer's market. Look at this picture (click on it and the look at the big size). His funny smile tells me he just realized I was taking his photo. This is the one I took just a moment before.

Changing things up

I colored my hair this red that looks a little like I'm permanently standing by the sunset light. I love it!!

Summer Imagery

I felt like I owed my blog some summer photography. For now, this does it. I'll post more as I take more.